Baking a cake.. hic

How to bake a cake!

3 cup flour
1 tsp. salt
1 cup dried fruit
1 cup nuts
2 cups sugar
2 tbsp. lemon juice
1 cup butter
1 gal. whiskey
2 eggs
butter or margarine to grease tin

Directions: Arrange ingredients on level working area
before starting.

Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Take a large bowl.
Check the whiskey again to be sure it is of the highest
quality. Pour one level cup and drink. Repeat...


Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 cup butter and flour
in a large, fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon sugar and beat again.

Make sure the whiskey is still OK. Try another tup. Turn
off mixer.

Break 2 legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of
dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets
stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticaty.

Next, sift 2 cups of salt. Or something. Who cares?

Whisk the checkey.

Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever
you can find. Grease the oven.

Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off
the turner.

Throw the bowl out of the window.

Check the whiskey again. Go to bed.